No, I’m not talking about some environmental zealot or self-serving politician. I’m talking about me. Let’s face it, I am a single mother who is barely holding onto her job. I don’t have time to read every environmental report issued by the IPCC, EPA, or the SOB. And I was pissed when I thought Obama’s State [...]
I truly wish that I could say this claim was figurative..but it’s me, which means, it is quite literal. My dog Phoebe was asleep in my bed last night, and around 2:00 a.m., she had to go out to pee. I begrudgingly took her outside in the arse freezing cold and tried to hook her to [...]
“Come Into His Gates And Be All You Can Be?” Hmmm…..Am I the only one who reads this and envisions men and women in green camouflage waterboarding St. Peter??? I am not even going to start with the Freudian symbolism….And what the heck is an INTERIMMISTERSTEVENALSPACH??? (fourth line of the sign)
And yes, I’m still a little [...]
I noticed that the Winter Olympics start on February 12th. Can you name ten athletes who are competing?
No? I can’t say that I’m surprised. By the look of the official logo, no one is taking this event seriously. My Gawd…Are there no artists over the age of five in Canada? Or have the committee’s eyelids frozen shut???
I [...]
On its best day, the logic and merit of ice dancing is questionable. So why? Oh why? Would a couple select this offensive mess as its attire??? Maybe they couldn’t find an Al Jolson costume…
And speaking of hot messes..Tara Reid has snagged herself a millionaire. This woman has fifteen pages designated to Google Images of her drunk and [...]
So a friend of mine was trying to give up smoking, and apparently his grandmother had great success with the notorious Yefim Shubentsov, otherwise known as the Mad Russian of Brookline.
Being a pessimist and general bad apple…I had my doubts. I helpfully suggested that my friend simply forget the circus sideshow and let me purchase a tazer. I [...]
So some guy has finally created the perfect rubber woman, and I’m not talking about a plastic surgeon…Some poor, lonely engineer has invented a robotic sex doll and put it on glorious blank staring exhibition at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Vegas.
Ah yes, Vegas. If you can’t get laid in this town, you are basically going to die a [...]
And now, I suddenly find myself rocking orange hair and granny glasses. Crap..somebody better throw a ring on this fast!!!!!
Today is Elvis’s birthday, and I dedicate this post to a man who popularized one of my favorite styles of music and fashion….Rockabilly. Young Elvis was so hot!!!…..You could put a pompadour on a pig, and I would probably go out with it. Put it on an actual man and stand the hell back, Sweeties!!!!
Many men, and women, [...]
Jesus loves Scott Bakula..and seriously, what’s not to love????
And..if that isn’t enough for you art affectionados..I have finally learned how to stretch a black velvet canvas. Can you just picture Bob’s Big Boy on velvet?? The idea sort of takes the breath away…huh?
