I am a woman who has a lot of male friends. They seem to tolerate my foul mouth and tendency to fart on my friend’s heads when I am drunk just a little better than most women. As a result, I get to hear all about their latest love conquests and once in a while, [...]
My awesome friend Rich just sent me this picture. He said that this product reminded him of me….Funny I imagine that underpants I am supposed to wear over my mouth would be more appropo. Plus..they don’t even have Hello Kitty on them. Underpants are just not right without a little _____________ . Pink, cartoon picture of a cat, of course….
You [...]
This is the God forsaken truth…I thought it would be a hoot to go to the Fetish Fair in Providence on Valentine’s Day. I honestly don’t have any personal interest in all those leather studded shenanigans, apart from what a great story the experience would make. As much as some bizarre fetish would really round out my repertoire, [...]
I wasn’t worried when my mother sent both my boys a Valentine but didn’t send me even one yellowed, crumpled doilie. However, I did start to wonder when the dog received a Valentine from my mother, and I remained ignored. It’s not that a thirty-nine-ish woman should need a Valentine from her mother, but I just wondered if [...]
I haven’t posted in a few days. I was busy freaking out over a meeting with my boss who as many of you know hates me the same way that I hate finding a dark curly hair on my hotel pillow. My favorite comments from my job review include: “You come across as little Mary Sunshine,” and “The percent [...]
No, I’m not talking about some environmental zealot or self-serving politician. I’m talking about me. Let’s face it, I am a single mother who is barely holding onto her job. I don’t have time to read every environmental report issued by the IPCC, EPA, or the SOB. And I was pissed when I thought Obama’s State [...]
I truly wish that I could say this claim was figurative..but it’s me, which means, it is quite literal. My dog Phoebe was asleep in my bed last night, and around 2:00 a.m., she had to go out to pee. I begrudgingly took her outside in the arse freezing cold and tried to hook her to [...]
“Come Into His Gates And Be All You Can Be?” Hmmm…..Am I the only one who reads this and envisions men and women in green camouflage waterboarding St. Peter??? I am not even going to start with the Freudian symbolism….And what the heck is an INTERIMMISTERSTEVENALSPACH??? (fourth line of the sign)
And yes, I’m still a little [...]
I noticed that the Winter Olympics start on February 12th. Can you name ten athletes who are competing?
No? I can’t say that I’m surprised. By the look of the official logo, no one is taking this event seriously. My Gawd…Are there no artists over the age of five in Canada? Or have the committee’s eyelids frozen shut???
I [...]
On its best day, the logic and merit of ice dancing is questionable. So why? Oh why? Would a couple select this offensive mess as its attire??? Maybe they couldn’t find an Al Jolson costume…
And speaking of hot messes..Tara Reid has snagged herself a millionaire. This woman has fifteen pages designated to Google Images of her drunk and [...]
